The Recap And Fashion Drama of The RHONY Season 8: Ep 15

Watching this season of The Real Housewives of New York, I have come to two conclusions. One, Sonja Morgan is a whore. Two, LuMann is a bigger whore. If she did in fact climb on top of her future husband while he was on a date with his girlfriend of three months (holding hands no less) and left with him that evening (did he just leave his date at the bar?) then that is horrible and so NOT very Countess-like. In fact, I dare to say it is very “See You Next Tuesday-like.” If you are one of those suckers who bought her book “Class with the Countess: How to Live with Elegance and Flair” I’d either demand your money back or light it on fire. Those two obviously deserve each other. How disgusting.

The Recap And Fashion Drama of The RHONY Season 8: Ep 13

After last week, I’m not really looking forward to this week’s episode of The Real Housewives of New York. I’m afraid we will have to suffer through a cat Bat Mitzvah or something equally insulting. This episode starts when Jules walks into a restaurant called “Wild” and asks for a pillow for her cooch. Then Dorinda enters (wearing a hideous dog t-shirt) and asks how her vagina is. “All we need is a venereal disease, a DNC and a pregnancy and we’ve covered the whole vagina topic. There’s a lot of vagina problems going on,” says an uncomfortable Dorinda.

The Recap And Fashion Drama of The RHONY Season 8: Ep 6

This episode of The Real Housewives of New York City begins with Sonja getting a massage and facial (of free sperm) from her gossipy massage/facialist therapist and simultaneously texting. There is nothing stopping her from texting. So relaxing. Getting ready for her birthday party. She’s wearing a towel so there isn’t much to talk about there. “John would never miss the opening of an envelope,” Sonja remarks lovingly. Now to Carole’s apartment where she has invited a psychic. Jules arrives looking skinny and chic with food from Eately which is ironic since Jules doesn’t eat. Then Dorinda arrives wearing a crazy bright silk poncho over and cameo Chanel bag which doesn’t match. Don’t worry, the poncho comes off to reveal a gray turtleneck! Of course, because she has to wear drab gray.

The Recap And Fashion Drama of The Real Housewives Of Dallas Season 1: Ep 5

One thing is for sure, I don’t think I could live in Dallas. The fashion is as loud as the women! OK, that is probably a gross generalization, but this show is NOT helping my opinion of Dallas. The word ‘class’ starts flying right out of the gate this episode where the fight from last week rages on. Hint, if you use the word “class,” chances are you haven’t got any.

The Recap And Fashion Drama of The Real Housewives Of Dallas Season 1: Ep 3

The preview for this episode of The Real Housewives Of Dallas hints Brandi (an ex-Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader) will get raunchy at a strip joint. Shoot me now. I figure if even 20% of the women who watch this show read this review, it will have been read by 10 people. The show is that bad.

I’m going to bounce around a lot because that’s what happens during these shows, so bare with me.