Thank goodness this season is almost over! I don’t think Alyssa’s baby is ever coming out and this All Stars thing is dragging on forever. So of course there were two challenges this week, because hey… Lifetime needs to stretch the episodes on for hours (it was hours, right?).
The main challenge is to create a Marilyn Monroe inspired Oscar red carpet worthy gown. It should be major and timeless, like the icon herself. The four remaining designers will have a $500 budget and one day to work. The winner of the challenge will have the chance (what does that mean exactly?) to design costumes for a Lifetime original movie (whoopee).
However when they get back from Mood there is a little red carpet waiting in the workroom and Issac enters with a dog. Not just any dog, but Lassie. The designers have a surprise mini challenge and this is for dog lovers! All four have to design doggie couture (models are rescue dogs from Best Friends Animal Society) in the style of a movie genre (picked by Lassie himself/herself). The two challenges are so disconnected it’s bizarre, but who doesn’t love dogs in costumes? Michelle wins this runway with her dog’s cowboy costume and Helen’s dog poops. Classic.
Back to the original challenge. Zanna’s critiques have Michelle making her usual snarly comments (which of course I love), Helen trying to save her boring gown and lots of sparkle talk. The only real excitement is when Sonjia’s zipper craps out and it’s not really that exciting.
Off to the runway! Georgina, Issac and Alyssa are joined by guest judge founder of Nasty Gal, Sophia Amoruso.
Dmitry – He wins this challenge easily! In fact Alyssa uses an expletive to describe her obsession. Dmitry’s use of tea to dye the fringe of his dress (I swear he keeps saying ‘tea-bagging’) and the clear straps are brilliant. While the judges feel it may not be dressy enough for the Oscar’s red carpet, it’s surely SAG red carpet worthy and pretty spectacular.
Sonjia – The silver/gold bow crop-top style of the top of this dress is very dramatic and memorable! It’s the sheer embroidered skirt of the dress that’s overkill. Georgina rightfully says it’s distracting and she has too many ideas in one gown, but Isaac loves the top, which is actually attached from the back. She wins a spot in the finale.
Michelle – After blowing her budget on her Lurex burnout velvet with ‘tons of sparkle’ the judges think it’s too cheap looking and sheer. The chain across the back cheapens it even further. Isaac thinks it’s her best work yet (really?) and is not sure if he hates or loves the thumb loops. She’s on the bottom.
Helen – Even though the color of her gown is boring and the silhouette nothing original, the judges like it more than I would have thought. She explains how she has to redesign the top of the gown and whatever…she ties for the bottom.
Michelle and Helen Face Off Challenge
Now Helen and Michelle are up for elimination and are asked to tell the judges why the deserve the last spot for the finale. I can’t remember what they say, but in a cruel twist of fate Alyssa gives them one more challenge. Both must repurpose at least three of the season’s loosing looks to create one stellar look in just one hour with no mannequin. Helen sobs because she thinks cutting the other’s work is cruel, but Michelle snaps her out of her haze by reminding her they were ugly. In the end Helen’s LBD wins and Michelle is out because her design isn’t as good and she only uses 2 looks. Whoops.
“Since Marilyn Monroe is an inspiration I’m thinking, ‘Oh, That’s a babe dress” … she’s gonna be a babe.” – Helen
“I don’t know what Helen is doing … I guess grandma is going to a wedding” – Michelle
“Up close, do I look cuter? ” – Isaac in the workroom
“My model pooped on the runway.”- Helen
“Shit Happens!” – Helen
“Ain’t nobody got time for this…” – Sonjia
“Hey Helen, you building a house?” – Sonjia
“I’m just being Sparkle Police.” – Michelle
“It looked like a dirty mop. Like the janitor came by and just mopped up some vomit in the hallway.” – Helen
“I need a whole new bodice…” Helen
“My crystal balls tell me your going home without sparkles…” – Michelle
“It’s probably the gowniest gown I’ve ever made.” – Michelle
“I’m just mad about midriff!” – Isaac
“Not me!” – Alyssa
“Might be my favorite thing I’ve ever seen on the All Stars Runway – ever!” – Alyssa
“Its really f*Ink beautiful…” – Alyssa
“Something about the chain was a little bit swanky” – Isaac
“Anything that resembles a belly chain is just not OK.” – Sophia Amaruso
“I’m not done yet, I need to win this!” -Dmitry
“I feel like I’m the underdog” – Sonjia
“Vomit out of my mouth…vomit out of my mouth.” – Helen
“There are all of the sad garments and dresses from the past challenges.” – Michelle
“I can’t cut up somebody’s work – like this is so f*d up!” – Helen
“Well why don’t you cut up the ugly stuff?” – Michelle
“Helen you are at your best – when you are a wreck…” – Alyssa
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– Lauren Dimet Waters