Project Accessory Season 1, Episode 5: Beach Blanket Blingo. Memorable Quotes from Last Night's Episode

Another week, another piece, another episode of Project Accessory. We return from this two week hiatus of turkey and stuffing and back to bling and runway disasters! We open on the boys lamenting on the judges opinions. They are down to seven and the competition is getting stiff.
We’re back to the runway with Molly Sims. Will she be bringing any sort of personality to the stage? I mean, seriously. She’s better than this. She asks the designers if they’re scared. I don’t blame them, they are looking BEAT. For the next challenge, … we get a runway full of bikinis. That’s great. We all just saw Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show and the new year is right around the corner. I’m calling a conspiracy here to stop me from eating this super size bag of Doritos in front of me and go on a diet… but it’s not gonna happen, Sims!
Designers with the highest scores first will be picking their models and designing three pieces: sandals, headwear and whatever other crap they can finish quickly an accessory of their choice. Adrian has delusions of grandeur and thinks that Molly was doing some kind of telekinesis for him to make a hat. Uh, …alright Adrian. And it seems that Rich gets stuck with the last remaining bathing suit, consisting of coral and some lime green contraption. Don’t feel bad Rich, all the swimsuits are hideous. Even the model knows that the suit is bad.

But another twist (not really)!  Sims says they will be heading somewhere for inspiration. What’s up, Adrian? The telekinesis didn’t go through that time? The gang is headed to Coney Island to meet up with Eva Jeanbart-Lorenzotti. Eva tells the designers that can only get their materials from the stores and beach. And boy, does everyone look flustered. Running and chaos ensues. Nina goes to the store to buy… jewelry. Um, isn’t that against the rules in some way? Or are we still just making them up as we go along?
Back at the workroom, Eva has absolutely no inflection in her voice whatsoever. I’m convinced she has no soul. She tells those sweatshop slaves worker bees get to work. Shea apparently picked up more sand than actual physical items so let’s see how this is going to play out. Brian tells us his concept and now I am fully convinced that he has been sniffing too much fabric glue.
Adrian and Christina start talking and it appears that Nina wasn’t the only one who bought something completely pre-made to use again. Adrian bought a hat to just bedazzle. Seriously, judges?! Not against the rules?! Once again, we are back on Rich and his constant wah-wah-wah-ing. Everyone is talking about how he’s gone completely mental. Christina’s in the corner saying her opening PR catchphrase and a bunch of other stuff but seriously… no one cares. She’s one of those people who talk just to hear her own voice. Diego is working in the back and totally adorable. And that is your weekly Diego Rocha update.
Brian‘s look… is just awful. It looks like some weird paper-white holey cheese Styrofoam … situation. There are no words for it, really. But he’s surprised me before so he could pull it out. And look, Eva’s back to give more cliched statements which mean nothing. She makes me miss Tim Gunn a lot. Eva gets to Adrian and she actually has something to say. Whaaaaat?! Color me surprised! She agrees that sticking an already made hat with just an added mesh brim is a total cop-out! Finally, some fire in that woman. It only took like, five episodes. And then we get to her and Rich, and we’re back to her normal blah personality. It was nice while it lasted. Shea’s freaking out and everyone’s agreeing with that. I’m sure by now we can all take a guess who’s going to be on the chopping block.
Next day, we’re back in the workroom. Brian gets back to his pieces and comes to the realization that the headpiece is super hiddy. Thank the Lord! He decides to scrap it and do something else. Adrian also has a realization as well that just adding a brim to a hat is NOT making a hat! Well, blow me down! Eva was dropping more knowledge than we all thought.
Shea seems to be rushing through her pieces and slices a bit of her thumb, therefore bleeding all over her pieces. Maybe bloodstained would be a hot new look. It would definitely show the dedication, that’s for sure. But with all this drama and failing about, we can’t be too sure if she’s being a trooper or just drama queen. With Shea, it always seems to work that way.
Models come in and it’s time for some John Frieda product placement. Whomever the head stylist is, he bugs my soul. He makes me long for Collier Strong, and that’s saying a lot. Five minutes are suddenly left and everyone’s back on frantic mode. Nothing is really looking good… I think everyone is in for a rude awaking on the runway. Our “favorite” judges are back. Yaaay. Sims is joined by Ariel Foxman, J. Crew’s Jenna Lyons and because Kenneth Cole still doesn’t give two flying Fig Newtons filling in for Cole is the prettiest clothing designer in all the land, Rachel Roy!

Runway time! Models walk and it’s better than expected (which isn’t saying too much). Christina is praised for her “she sells seashells by the seashore” gold necklace, Brian’s glam “Bam-Bam” look gets high notes, all of Nina’s look gets praise but Sims already thinks that her shtick is getting old, and Diego gets love for his bright and fluffy sandals. Adrian, Shea and Rich have the lowest scores: Rich is in the bottom for his styling, Adrian gets slack for not knowing how to edit, and Shea’s look is one big hot mess in which it looks as if shells just exploded everywhere.
Brian wins the challenge! But it’s a sad day for Shea because she’s kicked off. Another week down, as well as a designer… And it looks like Kenneth Cole might have some new product to plug because he’s back next week. Yaaaaay … or whatever. I refuse to waste an exclamation point on that last sentence.

Brian - The winner!

Christina with her model

Nina with her model

Diego with his model

Rich with his model

Adrian with his model

Shea - You are out!

Memorable Quotes
“Hello! You guys don’t look excited. You look scared.” – Molly Sims
“We might be going to Barcelona or we might be going to Florida… I hope it’s somewhere fun.” – Diego
“I think I just stepped in bird poop. Ahhh!” – Nina
“It’s a fine line between looking effortless chic and looking really tacky.” – Nina
“So, the concept of my look is very primitive tribal from an alien race.” – Brian
“I looked at Brian’s look and I think he may have gone a little too far with the fish Ice Capades thing.” – Nina
“Where’s my needle and thread? Why’s everything black?!” – Shea
“Seashells in a beach competition… It seems a bit obvious to me.” – Rich
“I don’t like the shoes. I wrote ‘cupcakes’ when they walked out on the runway.” – Ariel
Until next week! Be sure to check out our other favorite site dedicated to all things Project Runway…Blogging Project Runway!
– Taneisha Jordan
Photos: Lifetime

1 thought on “Project Accessory Season 1, Episode 5: Beach Blanket Blingo. Memorable Quotes from Last Night's Episode”

  1. Hey! I like Molly – I think she is very sweet. And, you are right, no one can fill Tim Gunn’s shoes but at least Eva was telling the designers what I was dying to say!


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