Project Accessory Season 1, Episode 2: Sole Searching. Memorable Quotes from Last Night's Episode

And we’re back for another week with a Project Accessory review! Hopefully, Molly Sims has stopped reading off the cue cards and some of the designers have calmed down a little bit (doubtful). And, we finally get to hear what the winner will receive. The winner will get $100,000 from eBay Fashion to start their own line (wait, don’t all the designers have their own lines already?), a feature spread in InStyle and a year supply of hairstyling from John Frieda… uh, okay?

We arrive in the morning after with more smack talking from Ms. Crazy Eyes Nicolina. Great. Didn’t we just finish with this with the other Project franchise? Back to RuPaul’s drag stage, Molly announces the next challenge: a little black dress will be the foundation for two accessory items. They head to their next destination and it is the Swarovski crystal shop with mentor Eva Jeanbart-Lorenzotti and Richard Chai! So cute! And the designers get to pick their favorite Swarovski piece to design around, including a pair of shoes?! What lucky bastards… Rushing ensues. Pieces are picked and back to the workroom. Is it just me or is the background music super loud on this show? I feel like I can’t hear the designers but this bass thumping beat is all up in my ear… Anyways, designers are talking too softly for me about their aspirations. Another peeve, is it me or is Brian not looking at the camera in his talking head? That, with the loud music is disconcerting. That’s fine because his piece looks gaudy as all get out and the less I know about it, the better. Another designer takes us through how to actually make a shoe. These are the parts of designing shows that I miss. Not the overblown drama but the steps of making a piece which people wear everyday and looks incredibly hard to do. So, thank you Rich. Kelly wants to make a stacked heel, like the ones seen on the runway. And just from the start, it looks like it’s being held together with spit and a prayer to Jesus. Good luck, girl. James (from Chicago!) is an expert shoe designer so others start coming to him for help. Of course, this bothers waterworks Nicolina because he’s actually helping them. And she’s ends with the dreaded reality competition speech. “I’m not here to make friends, I’m here to win.” It is officially a reality show, folks! Kelly starts freaking out about her stacked shoe dilemma, something we all knew was coming… just ten minutes into the episode. Adrian even tries to talk her out of it… will she listen? The next day comes. More working goes on and Kelly is changing her design. Thank you! You saved yourself the embarrassment. And I take back what I said about Brian’s shoe. He used the hot mess heel as a mold and then used the mold to make a black resin wedge heel. Eva is back and again… no freaking mentoring. Stop spouting cliches, woman and help these people! I am now convinced that bug-eyed Nicolina is there to cry and give out crazy eyes. Is she even making anything? Seriously, Lifetime. Show her making something and not just standing around with her eyes wide and mouth agape, staring at everyone else. Then comes the usual rush to finish everything. Eva messes with Adrian’s outfit and now the earrings aren’t finished. Kelly’s back to her stacked heel again, against the wishes of pretty much everyone on the Northern Hemisphere.

Runway time! The judges are here again: Sims with Kenneth Cole, Ariel Foxman and guest judge Nadja Swarovski.There is so much bling on my television right now is blinding me. Between the product placement jewelry and this stage. Holy macaroni necklace. James, Nicolina and Brian seem to be on the top. Adrian for not finishing his earrings, David for his nude putty shoes, and Kelly and her ill-fitting neon yellow stacked shoes are on the bottom. James is the winner of the challenge! And I guess it doesn’t matter if you don’t finish because Adrian gets to stay and Kelly is kicked out! Their reasoning was that because Adrian’s dress was so blinged out, it was like he did a third piece? Alright, whatever you say, guys… Week two down and still no definite favorites. It’s totally still everybody’s game!

Memorable Quotes: “I’m thinking… ‘elegantly overdone’.” – Adrian “Making a shoe is an art and it’s meditative for me.” – James “From my background as an accessory designer, I tend to be a looser artist. And I can’t do that with shoes because there’s math and there’s this and there’s that… it is a challenge.” – David “God forbid I don’t have enough time. I’ll probably pass out.” – Kelly “Will you make me a pair of shoes when we’re done with this?” – Shea “You’re my favorite size.” – James “Kelly’s shoes are … a hot mess.” – James “And I knew I wanted to build another Swarovski necklace just to bring that blllllling.” – Nicolina “I don’t understand the headband. To me, it’s very Xanadu and I don’t think that helps.” – Ariel Until next week! Be sure to check out our other favorite site dedicated to all things Project Runway…Blogging Project Runway! —Taneisha Jordan Photos: Lifetime