Carol and I were discussing what we were going to do for our New Years posts. Well since 2015 was not a very good year for me health-wise and I did little in the way of getting out and enjoying fashion, I thought I would focus on something I find almost as fun; discussing fashion and beauty trends I could not stand this year. To be frank, I actually liked a lot of the fashions this year so I asked for some help from some of our editors. As is true every year, there are some fashions that are just a big fat fail. Here are the trends we hope die and stay left where they belong…back in 2015, never to come back (but we know they will) again.
FASHION
Chewbacca furry shoes – yes, I know every fashion person went batshit crazy over the furry Gucci loafers, but did you really see regular humans wearing big, furry hoofs in real life?
Super short mini skirts – I have nothing against them if you have super long and toned stems and if you do, I am jealous. I guess I hate them mostly because I am now too old to rock them. Even with opaque tights.
Dickie turtlenecks – did you know they were even a thing? Again? Yeah, me neither. They were dumb in the 70’s and are still dumb so I’m thrilled this trend never really took off.
Overalls – if I’ve said it once, I’ve said it 100 times…overalls are only cute on those under 10.
Cropped pants – with bright or patterned socks. “The Facts of Life” went off the air in the 80’s and so did this trend.
Bucket bags – we love them in theory but they are impossible to use easily – you can’t get into them!
Fringe – a little goes a long way and while we like a little, when it’s overdone it’s ridiculous.
Grunge rock clothes – plaid shirts tied around the waist and chunky shoes just don’t work for us. Anymore.
Flaredpants and jeans – we can’t get behind this trend again, especially when they are high-waisted.
Crop tops – mostly these are a fail because they only work on models with tight abs. If you are over 30, stay far, far away. As in run screaming in the other direction.
Mom jeans – don’t you think the name alone says enough?
Excessive holey jeans – we are all for some rips and tears, but if you are over 30 and your jeans are trashed, they belong in the trash. Here is how to do holey jeans right.
Sparkly dresses or jewelry – fine for night, but in the middle of the day is so 2010.
BEAUTY
Crazy dyed hair – green hair looks good on no one! Well maybe Oscar the Grouch. OK? And if you are over the age of 40 you just look ridiculous. There. I said what everyone is thinking.
Kardashian-inspired over-contoured makeup (strobing) and over-lined lips. As Amy Schumer says “you have to love a family who uses their original faces as a mere suggestion.” We are all for faking it until you are making it, but there ain’t nothing natural about these overdone makeup tricks. Besides, too much contouring is actually aging.
Drawn-on Groucho Marx bold angular eyebrows – while we like fuller brows, anything drawn on when you are over 40 will make you look like a grandmother. Instantly.
90’s beauty trends – dark liner, super skinny brows or anything heroine chic should be left to Courtney Love.
Bring on 2016! Happy New Year!
-Lauren Dimet Waters
Image Layout: Fountain Of 30
